There are many hurdles living life as a quadriplegic for the most part a lot of them are similar to your average everyday ambulatory person. Obviously relationships, money, and day-to-day tasks etc. for the void that is our 24 hours a day life. There are certain things I found to be helpful when it comes to living life as a quadriplegic and in general. These aren’t specific to my injury but my situation is a great example of how to stay positive and always look forward.
1. Stop looking at the world as what you cannot do and start focusing on what you can do.
If there’s one thing I’ve learned through this injury despite my therapist’s persistence that I can do everything I did before is that I cannot. Understanding that simple fact has lead me to a greater acceptance of my limitations but also an increased motivation to improve on what I can do. I’m not saying to not strive for the unknown or for the impossible don’t stop shooting for the stars because you can wind up on the moon what I am saying is to not dwell on the negatives but focus improving positives.
2. Stop being so proud and allow people to help you.
So many people walk through life, no pun intended, feeling as if they are alone for no better reason than being too proud or afraid to ask for the help that they need. There are so many things we can do as human beings if we group together there is power in many but steps need to be taken by the individual to build upon the community. If I was told a year ago that I would be asking for help or donations for myself I would’ve laughed in your face but I realize now that it is not about that, it is about being a part of something bigger than yourself. That in itself is very powerful.
3. Don’t take your frustrations out on those people.
Probably the most important thing because of the situation you find yourself in as a quadriplegic you may feel like lashing out. I’m sure a lot of us feel this way without adding to it the frustration of not being able to use your arms and legs. When I feel frustrated I attempt to put myself into a meditative state of retrospection in hopes to find resolution to the current problem. For me that usually means asking others for help whether it be the people in my immediate circle, groups am involved with, or my network of friends and family. But what I do not do is blame others for my issues for my problems for my handicaps I do not treat them like any of this is their fault and I make sure I own my decisions whether good or bad.
Funny thing is while writing this I was served an eviction because my landlord didn’t pay her mortgage so bad things come and is not about the hurdles put in your way or the walls that life throw up it’s your ability to run and jump to move around to find answers and keep moving forward that defines you. So stop dwelling on what you cannot do and start working on and proving the things that you can.